Premarital Counseling in New York, New Jersey & Connecticut
Build a strong foundation for the marriage you’re creating.
Getting married is an exciting transition—and an opportunity to have meaningful conversations about the relationship you want to build together.
Premarital counseling gives you space to explore how you communicate, navigate differences, make decisions, and bring your individual histories and expectations into your relationship. You don't need to be struggling or have a "problem" to benefit.
I offer premarital counseling for couples in New York, New Jersey, and Connecticut who want to enter marriage with greater understanding, connection, and intention—whether you're preparing for your first marriage or building a new chapter together.
What Do You Talk about in Premarital Counseling?
Every couple is different, so our work will reflect the questions, strengths, and challenges that matter most in your relationship.
We may explore:
Communication and conflict
Finances and attitudes toward money
Sex, intimacy, and affection
Children and parenting expectations
Careers, household roles, and responsibilities
Family-of-origin patterns
Boundaries with extended family
Values, beliefs, and traditions
Expectations about marriage and your future together
The goal isn't to make sure you agree about everything before getting married. Differences are part of every relationship. What's more important is understanding how you approach those differences—and developing healthier ways of talking about them together.
The Patterns You Bring into Marriage Matter
None of us enters a relationship as a blank slate.
We bring experiences from our families, previous relationships, and the ways we've learned to handle closeness, conflict, vulnerability, and change. Often, we don't fully recognize these patterns until a relationship puts them into motion.
As a marriage and family therapist, I'm interested not only in what you disagree about, but in what happens between you when differences arise.
Premarital counseling can help you recognize those patterns earlier, understand one another more deeply, and develop ways of responding that strengthen rather than undermine your connection.
Premarital Counseling for Second Marriages
Preparing for marriage can look different when one or both partners have been married before.
A second marriage may involve children, former spouses, co-parenting relationships, established financial lives, or understandable concerns about repeating patterns from previous relationships.
Premarital counseling gives you space to talk openly about what each of you is bringing from the past—and what you want to create differently this time.
Our work may explore blended-family expectations, finances, boundaries with former partners, parenting and stepparenting roles, trust, and how previous relationships continue to influence the present.
Planning a second marriage? Read Getting Remarried? What to Talk About Before a Second Marriage.
Premarital Counseling Isn’t Just for Couples Who Are Struggling
You may have a strong, happy relationship and still benefit from counseling before marriage.
Premarital counseling can help you understand each other's communication and conflict styles, explore expectations about married life, talk through topics you've been avoiding, and develop tools for navigating future challenges together.
Seeking premarital counseling doesn't mean something is wrong. It can simply mean you're being thoughtful about one of the most significant relationships in your life.
My Approach to Premarital Counseling
My approach is warm, active, and collaborative. I won't simply give you a checklist of topics you're supposed to agree on before getting married.
Instead, we'll use the conversations that matter to you to better understand how your relationship works.
I'll help you notice communication patterns, slow down difficult conversations, explore what's underneath your reactions, and identify practical ways to navigate differences more effectively.
My work is informed by systemic and relationship-focused approaches as well as Level 1 training in the Gottman Method.
The goal isn't a conflict-free marriage. It's developing a stronger understanding of yourselves as a couple and building the skills to navigate what comes next together.
Online Premarital Counseling in New York, New Jersey & Connecticut
I provide premarital counseling primarily through secure virtual sessions for couples located in New York, New Jersey, and Connecticut, with limited in-person availability in New York City.
Virtual sessions can make premarital counseling easier to fit into busy work schedules, wedding planning, and everyday life.
Frequently Asked Questions
When should we start premarital counseling?
There's no single right time. Some couples begin several months before their wedding, while others start earlier or closer to the date. Giving yourselves enough time to explore important topics without feeling rushed is generally helpful.
How many premarital counseling sessions do we need?
The number of sessions depends on your relationship and what you'd like to explore. Some couples are looking for a focused series of conversations before marriage, while others discover areas they'd like to spend more time working through.
Do we need to be engaged?
No. Premarital counseling can also be helpful for couples who are seriously considering marriage or another long-term commitment and want to think more intentionally about their future together.
What if we're already having relationship problems?
You can still benefit from premarital counseling. If you're experiencing significant ongoing conflict, betrayal, uncertainty about the relationship, or other substantial concerns, we may discuss whether couples therapy or discernment counseling would better fit what you need.
Do you work with couples entering a second marriage?
Yes. Preparing for a second marriage can bring unique considerations, including children, blended families, finances, former spouses, co-parenting relationships, and concerns about repeating patterns from previous relationships.
Premarital counseling can help you understand what each of you is bringing into the marriage while having thoughtful conversations about what you want to create together.
What is the difference between premarital counseling and couples therapy?
Premarital counseling is generally focused on preparing for marriage and having important conversations about your future together. Couples therapy is often more focused on addressing existing relationship difficulties or patterns that are causing distress. There's overlap between the two, and we can talk during your consultation about which approach best fits your relationship.
Start Your Marriage With Intention
You don't need to predict every challenge you'll face together. What you can do is develop a deeper understanding of one another and how you'll navigate those challenges when they arise.
If you're considering premarital counseling in New York, New Jersey, or Connecticut, I'd be happy to learn more about your relationship and see whether working together feels like a good fit.